Pervasive Smothering

I forgot to tell you about this project for my ‘Development of Entrepreneurs’ class, in which my teammates and I came up with an idea to set up a portal, called ‘moviExpress‘, in which you could rent a movie and have it delivered to your house (and afterwards set up a proper time in which we would pick it up).

Anyways, it’s just a prototype. Doesn’t work, but I made it so that it matched the moviExpress Forum skin. Please tell me if you liked the design.

Best.Foamy.Episode.Ever
Amityville Toaster - Rumor has it that when you put in pumpernickel you get a blueberry muffin!

The Amityville Toaster!
Make breakfast spooky!
Spooky talk from toaster…
Spooky eating toast!
yum yum yum…
human hand…

This is perhaps one of the best parodies I’ve seen, celebrating the Trilogy’s anniversary. Go check it out

Firefox Extensions
11. GetOffYourLazyButtAndWalkToTheFrontDoorForPetesSake 0.01 - Snail mail notifier
10. Tab-A-Licious 0.3 - Move tabs anywhere. You heard me. Anywhere.
9. MajorityNow - Surfs while your computer is idle to increase the browser usage stats for Firefox.
8. FoxySomething 0.8 - CD-tray ejector
7. ClassiqView 1.1 - Also known as “I can’t believe it’s not IE.” Breaks W3C compliance.
6. ExtendItNow! 2.1 - Pings update.mozilla.org every 15 seconds so you’ll know when it’s back up. Never have outdated extensions again!
5. BirdWatch 0.3 - Interprets gestures using webcam and adds the appropriate emoticons in IM client or email.
4. PopUpEncourager - For those popup lovers, for every popup window on a webpage, FireFox will display 2.
3. MgroeningFortune 6.6 - Pops up random Simpons quote related to the current website. Flanderiser impro-diddli-oved.
2. DDDownload 0.65 - Automatically sorts all downloaded pictures based on hair color and cup size.
1. SpamHelper 0.98 - Automatically gets all email addresses from pages you visit and adds them to your list of “customers.”

I’ve set up a forum for you guys. It’ll be another way in which you might leave me a message. If anyone would like to be a moderator, I’ll happily add you to the list. This forum will be as much as the people that visit this blog make of it. So, if you’d like to share ideas, and start a community, please go to The Incredible Forum of a Weird Dude.

I highly encourage you to read this witty satire. A bit confusing for the un-iniciated in tech language, but you’ll end up rolling on the floor, laughing afterall.

Ok. Enought time has passed, and I’m posting the complete version written by Gene Ziegler.

A Grandchild’s Guide to Using Grandpa’s Computer

Bits Bytes Chips Clocks
Bits in bytes on chips in box.
Bytes with bits and chips with clocks.
Chips in box on ether-docks.

Chips with bits come. Chips with bytes come.
Chips with bits and bytes and clocks come.

Look, sir. Look, sir. read the book, sir.
Let’s do tricks with bits and bytes, sir.
Let’s do tricks with chips and clocks, sir.

First, I’ll make a quick trick bit stack.
Then I’ll make a quick trick byte stack.
You can make a quick trick chip stack.
You can make a quick trick clock stack.

And here’s a new trick on the scene.
Bits in bytes for your machine.
Bytes in words to fill your screen.

Now we come to ticks and tocks, sir.
Try to say this by the clock, sir.

Clocks on chips tick.
Clocks on chips tock.
Eight byte bits tick.
Eight bit bytes tock.
Clocks on chips with eight bit bytes tick.
Chips with clocks and eight byte bits tock.

Here’s an easy game to play.
Here’s an easy thing to say….

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted ’cause the index doesn’t hash,
Then your situation’s hopeless, and your system’s gonna crash!

You can’t say this? What a shame sir!
We’ll find you another game sir.

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That’s repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
‘Cause as sure as I’m a poet, the sucker’s gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy’s getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary RISC,
Then you have to flash your memory and you’ll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!